English Health

You need love, compassion and caring — and then sex

Every couple wants to get the best out of their time between the sheets to accomplish mutual pleasure. Nevertheless, time and time again, men end up finishing earlier, leaving women wanting for more.

However, there’s no need to fret as there are certain sex positions which will let both of you enjoy intimacy at the same time.

There are so many sex positions, or sex styles as some call them, which you can try where both enjoy toe-curling orgasms. Also, trying different sex positions will help you explore and understand which best sex style works well for you. Mutual Climax condoms from Durex is the No.1 choice for synchronized sex and climax. They are ribbed on the outside to speed her up and have benzocaine lube on the inside to slow you down —a true win-win.

Here are some sex positions or sex styles to rock your world

1. The Cowgirl

This position is quite common among women who love to take the reins. In this position, the man lies on his back, and the woman is on top, facing him. This gives the woman control over depth, penetration, pace of intercourse, and clitoris stimulation.

The position allows men to easily stimulate the women with their hands, thereby helping the women achieve orgasms quicker. Even the penis gets a different kind of stimulation since the woman ends up moving back and forth instead of up and down, giving the max extra time too.

2. Missionary

Among the many different sex styles, the missionary sex position is a hot favourite. This sex style involves the woman lying on her back with the man lying facedown on her. The reason people pick the missionary sex position as their best sex style is because it is simple and effective. Shifting the legs a little can stimulate different parts of the body.

3. Spooning

Despite being seen as an act of affection among couples, it can also be used as a sex position.

It is ideal when you want to take your time getting intimate with your partner and are feeling a bit lazy at the same time. The position involves the man lying on his side, spooning the woman from behind, and slowly penetrating. The man won’t get overstimulated and will last longer as the penetration is slow and shallow.

Women, on the other hand, are in for a special treat as the proximity between the two is such that the penis rubs against her G-spot. This can amplify the intimacy, making it easier for her to achieve an orgasm. Many women consider this as one of their best positions for sex.

4. Cross

Compared to the other sex positions in the list, the cross might not be the first thing on your mind. Plus, you might find it a bit difficult to pull off. However, if you manage to master this one, it can be very rewarding for both you and your partner.

The position has got its name from the way the partners form a cross with their bodies, as the man lies on his side with the woman on her back, legs raised. The man then enters by opening her legs and pressing himself against her. This position involves deeper penetration and gives the woman a heightened level of pleasure. With limited movement, there will be less chances of the man leaving the party soon.

5. Modified Doggy Style

You might be aware of the doggy style sex position, but what about the modified doggy style position? As the name suggests, it is an advanced version of the old favourite.

In the original position, you have the man thrusting the woman from behind, who is on all fours, as the man holds on to her hips. In the modified doggy style, the woman lowers herself down, with the man doing the same.

Even though the man and woman would experience the same thrill of the doggy style, this modified posture is designed for a longer intimate session. As the penetration won’t be that deep, both partners will work towards achieving that mutual climax. No wonder this is one of the best sex positions for many couples.

6. One More Worth a Mention

Apart from these top 5 sex positions, there is one more that should be on the list of best sex positions. It’s called ‘Sitting’, as it’s another slow burner guaranteed to give you an explosive climax.

In this position, the man sits cross-legged with the woman straddling on top of him. The woman wraps her legs around his back and links her arms around his neck. This way, she gets to control the pace of things and also experience deep penetration, but without the chance of overly deep thrusting. Faster thrusting is generally the reason behind a quick end to intimacy, and hence the Sitting is a must-try.

Although you might have a favourite position for sex, it’s a great idea to keep trying different sex positions and aim for total mutual satisfaction. So, go ahead, enjoy sex without worrying about it all ending too soon.

This infographic sheds light on some of the most popular sex positions tried by couples across the globe and explains how it helps both partners achieve orgasms.

Sexual Styles that Don’t Match

Are you a once-a-week person, while your partner is wanting it three times a day? Does the difference in your sex drives cause problems in your relationship? A good sexual relationship is one that is gratifying to both partners … and The Dr. has some advice to get you there.

If your sexual relationship is not living up to your needs, stop complaining and start asking for what you want. This means you first need to look within to identify your needs. When you communicate, be specific.

Do you really know what your partner wants? Find out. Maybe you and your partner are not as far apart as you think. Talk about things when you are both calm and rational. Don’t blame each other; talk openly.

Relationships are about negotiation and compromise — and it never stops. Carve out time. Negotiate a plan that works for both of you. Behave your way to success. If you agreed to a plan and it’s no longer working for you, sit down together and negotiate a new plan. Partners rarely have the same level of sex drive at the same time. Negotiate for some middle ground that you can both be happy with.

Don’t base a relationship on sex. You need love, compassion and caring — and then sex can be a reflection of that. Don’t think of it in either/or terms: You can cuddle when it’s time for that, have an active sex life as well, and have tremendous love and respect for each other throughout.

Different people have a different language of love. For example, a lot of guys think, “I mowed the yard. Doesn’t that say I love you?” Are you speaking a language that your partner understands?

Look at your emotional needs because they affect your sexual relationship as well.

What sexual baggage did you bring to the relationship? For example, if sex defined previous relationships that failed, you may be reluctant to get too sexually active in a new relationship. Look at your history and learn from it.

Don’t use sex for the wrong reasons, and burden it or load it up with too much meaning. For example, it shouldn’t be a way to validate your partner. It should be an extension of the caring, feeling and respect you have for the other person. What kind of excuses are you making? If it’s that your daughter is going to walk in, “put a cowbell on her,” says The Dr. It’s OK to lock the door and tell your kids not to disturb Mum and Dad.

The choices you make have consequences. For example, if you choose to work, go to school and have a family, you may have very little left to invest in a sexual relationship. Change your behaviour and decisions if you want different consequences. Try delegating responsibility if you’re too exhausted or over-worked for sex.

The quality of a relationship depends on how well it meets the needs of those involved. Consider your partner’s needs as legitimate, and look at how you can meet those needs. Don’t label your partner as being wrong or having something wrong with him/her because that dismisses the issue.

Are you getting him/her in the mood? If your version of foreplay is “Honey, brace yourself,” you may want to try doing things differently. You may need to work a little harder to motivate, inspire, seduce or attract your partner. If your wife is exhausted from a busy day of chasing kids around, try to do some things that will decompress her. Run a bath and let her relax while you put the kids to bed. Even the smallest gesture can seem romantic to your partner.

Talk to your doctor for more information about whether biochemical and hormonal factors can be contributing to a low or high sex drive.


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